A gem of a bad date from someone else…

This is just a quick story I heard from a girl I dated briefly. It’s just amazingly bizarre and odd.

A disaster date…

So a few months before this girl (let’s call her Laura) and I had met, she had gone out on a few dates with this guy (let’s call him Bill). Bill seemed to be interesting enough and there seemed to be a decent amount of chemistry.

They were on their fourth or fifth date. He had just made dinner and things were going well. They were sitting on the couch, on the verge of a major makeout session. Or so it seemed…

The date takes a turn…

He leaned in close to her on the couch. She readied herself for a kiss. Instead his lips glided next to her ears.

“Tell me your darkest, deepest secret,” he said.

“Excuse me,” she stammered as she recoiled from the couch.

He kept his position and with a sly smile on his face repeated the demand, “Tell me your darkest, deepest secret.”

Her face twisted and contorted trying to figure out what the f*** he was talking about.

Laura finally managed to get out, “Um. No. We’ve only known each other for a few days.”

The point of the awkwardness…

It was then, that Bill finally came out and decided to reveal himself someone into…

S&M HandcuffsThat’s right. Bill’s awkward, creepy and vaguely menacing request was his way of seeing if Laura was into S&M.

And not only that but he was so clearly not reading her reactions (disgust, confusion, disquiet) that he continued on in gory detail about how his ex-girlfriend had loved to tie him up. How his ex-girlfriend had loved to be tied up. How his ex-girlfriend loved to be whipped. And so on and so forth.

Bill was so concentrated into describing this great relationship that he barely noticed as Laura had made her way to the door.

Before she closed the door on his apartment and any chance of a relationship, she said, “Never, ever call me again.”

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7 responses to “A gem of a bad date from someone else…

  1. HAHAHAHHAHAHAHA i remember this story!

    love the blog, you guys. it’s awesome. do you accept guest writers?

  2. Hee hee. I met someone who was a chubby chaser once. He was so into his own little fetish that he didn’t notice my disgust as he lasciviously gazed at my extra folds of flesh while describing what sexual acts he would like to do with them. I finally understood what it was like to have a man talk to a body part instead of looking into your eyes. Creeeeepeeeeeee!

  3. LittleMissSarcasm

    Oh snap! I had a moderately similar experience with a fella, but he confessed his affinity for “all things freaky” at the end of the first date.

    Great post. Thanks!

  4. Oh yeah, very awkward! That is not the right way to Start Love. Isn’t there another way to find out if someone is into that stuff instead of just revealing it a few dates in? I would have done the same thing and just ran away!

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